I received a WhatsApp message from a friend today that
got me thinking. It is one of those messages that annoyingly clog the phone in these
days of pandemic-enforced restrictions when majority of people had little else
to do but fiddle with their handsets.
The summary of the message is that life is largely vanity; the house
your father built is today being occupied by strangers because it is either too
old fashioned or the children are too far away to bother. The many properties
you are also gathering presently will someday most likely meet similar fate. If
you die in your struggles, your spouse would be in someone else’s arms, perhaps
your closest friend, in no time at all. The second aspect of the message is
that people should live more for the good of others and less for self. Bla
bla..
The message, by the way, was not my friend’s original
creation. It was part of the general circulation that people who find them
meaningful keep forwarding to their contacts. Now, let’s examine the import of
the message. Is it truthful or not? Of
course, it is. Backed by facts of the
experiences several people have had at one point or the other, it is certainly not far-fetched. We regularly see or hear of families with identical stories. As for being
charitable, there is little to be said about this. Extending kindness to others
is generally accepted as a virtue to be much cultivated.
However, before going further, I need to introduce this
my pal to you. Like many men, he has had
his fair share of ups and downs. Sadly, perhaps due to several missed
opportunities or having made more errors than good judgement along his journeys,
he presently has far less to show for his efforts today than his circumstances
ought to be. Therefore, this kind of message would appear to suit his present physical
and psychological condition quite well. Now, this is where it becomes important
to watch who and what we listen to. What is good for the goose may sometimes be poisonous
for the gander.
Back to the subject of my focus. These days, the common news of sickness and
death all over the place because of the pandemic can really cause some people’s
faith to falter. What's the purpose of life's desires and pursuits? Seeing the rich and the
wealthy die so helplessly, and their vast estates sometimes becoming subjects
of litigation or rumoured feuds within their families, these can provide some sense
of justification to those who lack the drive to achieve anything significant in
life. “Afterall, those who made it, what
became of their wealth eventually”?, they ask disdainfully.
Yet, there is a flip side to this kind of reasoning. Should the fear of what becomes of your
acquisitions after death, in the hands of your children or spouse, checkmate your
drive for success, even stupendous richness?
To my mind, it is counterproductive to think in this manner. Provided you are not a thief, or one who
acquires wealth by ungodly means, it serves no purpose to restrain yourself in the
height of success your legitimate efforts in business or career can attract to
you.
Again, there is the ever-difficult question of what is
much or too much in terms of a person’s drive for wealth and success. Being contented with a particular level of success,
or whether a man is moderately or inordinately ambitious, these are positions
as different in meaning as the personality defining the words.
In a nation like Nigeria that lacks basic
infrastructures, social amenities and institutionalized support systems, people
outside government depend to a very large extent on individual effort to
survive in business and personal enterprise. Whilst always contending with family and societal pressures, for you to maintain your position and
prevent a slide in your financial status and class, you require some doggedness. It's like a fight of life, literally. Put differently, to stay on the same spot, you
must keep running. So, imagine what you
have to do to advance.
Now, if you don’t plan for old age, what happens if
you live that real long? There are those who acquire multiple properties knowing
that upon retirement they will fall back on the sales or rents accruing from
such investments. You may have done well enough for the children’s education
and their future financial independence, but in your old age it will be gratifying enough
to see them take good care of themselves rather than you being their burden.
Therefore, except for those who deny themselves the comfort
that is well within their reach, a man’s success is first and foremost to his own
immediate benefits and the enjoyment of members of his nucleus family. He can indulge himself in travels, chose a kingly residence and live his dreams. Of course, it is
eminently rewarding to help the needy, but the rich should be free to decide if
and whom to help with their finances. It is uncharitable, coming from others, to
expect that a man must bear the world on his back in order to demonstrate selflessness. Only Jesus is a Messiah.
There are those who live with the mentality that the
rich owe them a living. If you pander to their messages, and carry people’s
burdens to your own disadvantage, only you will bear the consequences.